Psychologist and Clinical Psychotherapist
C.S.W; B.S.Sci.Psych (Hons); FACCP; LMAAPi

Boyfriend can’t maintain an erection wearing a condom

My boyfriend is having a great deal of trouble maintaining an erection when he wears a condom. I recognize the obvious answer is to have blood tests, and not have other partners, and then we can have sex without a condom, which we did very early in our relationship. But unfortunately, I cannot take the pill, I have tried everything and I have various side effects. At this moment in time our only option is for him to wear a condom, and so would like some advice re his problem.


Your boyfriend is not the first guy to lose his erection after putting on a condom. Some guys complain that they do not feel anything, others find the latex irritating, and others resent wearing a condom and being solely responsible for contraception. If your problem relates to your partner not feeling anything, then in this instance I recommend you prolong the time of erection to when he puts on the condom. This can be done by you putting on the condom when he is fully erect, use the moment as sexual play by using hands and mouth to help him stay excited. If he dislikes the feeling of latex, go and shop around for different condoms. They now come in a variety of sizes, textures, thickness, and degrees of lubrication. If his problem is a psychological one, re birth control or resenting the barrier that males sometimes feel with condoms, then I suggest you also look at alternate forms of contraception other then the pill.


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